and it's driving me crazy cuz..

The word "lonely" often has a negative connotation. Face it, nobody wants to be lonely. (Did you break out in song because I did). There has been songs made about loneliness, sing it Christina, my amigo Ricky, and my homie mr. lonely himself, Akon. Some of people's deepest fears are growing old by themselves, or dying alone. Even when people describe being a lonely old person, they add "with lots of cats and dogs" into the scenario. If they have to be lonely old person, at least have some kitties and puppies too.

This fear of being alone can drive a lot of people to do a lot things like staying in a bad relationship, adopt the entire SPCA, have babies, unable to go to the restroom, and write songs. What is it about human nature that makes us want to be in pairs? (Well... mostly pairs excluding other forms of company that I won't get into.) I've seen too many people in bad relationships because they fear so badly of being alone. People become desperate and they settle for less to avoid it. I mean, females can't even go to the bathroom alone and god forbid, the horror of eating a meal alone! Even if you have a bad habit, or an irrational emotion, as long as someone else has gone through it, it makes you feel better. Even if you are deathly afraid of pickles that you will cry at the sight of one, or feel jealous that your boyfriend calls Brad Pitt hot, you feel sane and so much better if someone says "ME TOO!" because you feel less alone.

What is it that make people so afraid? (sometimes myself included) At times, I actually prefer being alone. I enjoy other people's company but I enjoy my own as well. I like catching up with myself and reflecting over things I've learned or experienced. For me (for you for me for you - Randy Jackson), I rather be alone and a 3rd, 5th, 7th, 9th wheel than to be stuck in an abusive, bad relationship. And what if I want to take a dump! I wouldn't want to put a girlfriend through that! I'm sure you girls can relate. There are times when you want to go to the ladies room to fix up or engage in an activity you rather not share and when you excuse yourself somehow as if it's woman's law, other girls jump up to join you and you half-smile and do a little $#%*! number in your head.

All I'm saying is, loneliness is not that bad of a thing. 1 is the loneliness number but also a pretty good number. I love people and I love myself. I enjoy another's company and my own.